Tag Archives: Time

The ridiculousness of us all

I get the most bizarre emails and questions every day.  I can either get annoyed, or laugh.  And to be honest, I choose the latter.

For instance, a lady enquired about a course today and I replied by email, giving the details and asking if she wants me to reserve her place.  She replies by telling me:  “No, I will go back home the same day”.

What?  Really?  I have a hotel?

But it has to do with a different frame of reference, a different education and a different culture.  What seems ridiculous to me is a perfectly normal assumption to the other person.  Like when they tell me they are on their way to Hollywood but need to start somewhere.  Or that they are the next big thing on the world’s stage.  Hey!  I hope so too.

I do have days where I get annoyed because it is one ridiculous question or comment after the other.  But luckily most of the time my sense of humour wins the battle and I land up sitting here with tears in my eyes.

 

 

 

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There is enough time in a day

Here are two facts:

  • The more you do, the more you get done
  • The less you do, the less time you have even for little things

When my drinking was at its worst I hardly functioned.  Everything seemed like an insurmountable mountain, so I just shelved it.  Which meant I had to do the same with every new task after that.  It all just snowballed.  I copied what I had to do today into tomorrow’s calendar, then into the day after and so forth until even re-writing it became too much.  The guilt and worry over all my unfinished business haunted my nights.

Under normal circumstances though, I find that even when I have a lot to do, there is always a bit of time to tackle something else.  Because it is true that each day has enough time for the things of that day.  And you will be rewarded with that wonderful sense of accomplishment when you have completed all you had set out to do.

Your body produces adrenalin when you are busy which propels you forward.  It helps you do and achieve more.

It is so easy to get home tired and be unavailable to those who love you most.  A good rule is to allow yourself and/or your spouse thirty minutes from when you step in the door to unwind.  To do whatever you want.  Afterwards it will be easier to face and listen to your family.  We are not a chatty household.  But we always know what is happening in one another’s lives.  When there is a problem, I set the table and we discuss the issue at dinner.

I am always so pleased when I complete the evening’s cooking because it is the very last thing I have to do.  After that I can officially wipe out the “5th of February 2012”. There is a great sense of relief in retiring to my bedroom.  It is also the time that partners talk and enjoy one another.

Getting through each day without worry or stress requires faith.  It also requires staying in the moment and not running ahead of yourself.  When we were tied up on the floor during our armed robbery, I had the pleasure of realizing the concept of staying in the moment.  There was no point in thinking about what they could do to us.  What use would it have been had I considered that they could gang-rape me?  And that they probably had AIDS?  Or that they could shoot us?  Instead, I stayed focused on what was happening at that instant, so that I could do whatever was best for that moment.  The preservation of our lives outweighed all scary future scenarios.  I was fully anchored in each exact second.  Which created a sense of calm in everybody and ultimately saved our lives.

So, make a list of everything that needs to be done today.  And don’t stress about it.  Tackle them one at a time without worrying about the next one.  And if there is something that you cannot get to, put it under tomorrow.

Because, tomorrow is a brand new day.


Partnerships

The ship that rarely sails.  Or that sets off and glides along for a good while before hitting an iceberg or a rock.  Or where a mutiny on deck causes a power shift and a new commander makes for ports unchartered for.

Why is this?  Because of inherent differences in people, their opinions, visions and goals.  Often times it is due to unscrupulous partners and greed.  The lack of hesitation in using another for personal gain.  Seeing a talent, skill, attitude or attribute in someone else that can be used to one’s own personal advantage.  Knowing full well, that when the usefulness of the partner has been spent, he will be thrown overboard somewhere at sea.  Having brought to the table what the vulture needed, but could not supply himself.

Signing contracts are of no use.  It will eventually cost more to get out of a contract through a lawyer than what it will to just walk away.  And as always, the lawyer will be the only one who makes a profit as he feeds off the lack of knowledge or understanding, differences of opinion and misfortunes of others.

When two people shake hands, it is on the assumption of mutual trust.  No one does this if they imagine that the other has diabolical intentions once out at sea.

There is the ship owner that offers shares in a vessel as well as a captaincy to another.  The latter mans, repairs, cleans and loads the ship and sets of to trade, waving goodbye and bon voyage to the former standing on the quay.  But no sooner has the ship disappeared from view before the original owner sets off in full pursuit, clambers aboard and wrenches back the controls in an act of piracy.

Then there is the partner that offers a partnership and initially works hard, side-by-side.  But as time goes by, he starts missing voyages due to other commitments and eventually completely fails to board.  The other is left with a 100% of the work and only 50% of the profit, yet is expected to be, and act grateful, forever and ever amen.  This while lining the coffers of him no longer there.

True also is that rosy skylines are marred by partners that are always late, and those who never take calls or return messages.  All of which could lead to mutiny.

Even under the best of weathers, with the most trustworthy of partners, and without an ounce of maliciousness on the horizon, the partnership will have more stormy waters and rough seas to contend with than could ever have been envisioned at the outset.  This ship has the potential to ruin even the finest of friend, or family relationships.

So dear seafarers, I wish to encourage you to study carefully the character of another, read again and again through a ship’s logs and papers, suspiciously revise the behaviour of sea routes, calculate costs, conjure up future scenarios ,weigh, weigh and weigh options, both personal and financial, before ever stepping aboard another man’s ship.


On blogging

I am now in my fourth month of blogging and I have decided to capture the experience so far, in the hope that when I look back, perhaps in a year, that I, and the experience, would have matured or altered in some way.

Why did I start in the first place?  For one reason and one reason only, to get back into the habit of writing.  I had stopped for so many years that I just the thought of writing scared me.  I saw blogging as a way to get back into the groove, which meant, writing daily.

Initially I found it difficult to blog every day.  I had a million excuses and fifty other things to do.  I would stare at my blank screen, read my mail, write a sentence, check my Facebook page, etc.  Ad nauseum.  I do still do it but less often.

I have learnt that you can skip a day or so, but missing a week diminishes traffic to such an extent that you almost have to start from scratch.  Or maybe just when You are a new blogger.  Anyway, the discipline that goes with the exercise has been so beneficial.  In the beginning I felt that I had to finish my daily post by a certain time.  Now it doesn’t matter anymore, as long as I write.

With a bit more writing behind me, I have found that the editing time has decreased somewhat.  Initially I would write for thirty minutes and edit for three hours.  Now I am less anal about it and to be honest, I really don’t have that kind of time.  I have eased up on myself, allowing for the fact that nothing in life is perfect.  Anyway, even had I edited one post for twenty hours, I would still not have been satisfied.  At some point one has to let go.  Put the baby in the crib so to speak.  A useful tool that I learnt early on in life is not to start editing until I had finished writing.  Editing while writing takes long and is discouraging.  Writing should not be a chore.

At first I had difficulty coming up with daily ideas and made use of Digg, Plinky and similar websites.  Now, I grab an event or a thought that stood out during the day, and elaborate on it.

Today strangely enough, was different.  I had no clue what to say.  I turned to my son for ideas.

Typically boy, he replied:  “I don’t know Mommy, anything” .

“Please Kyle, just throw words at me, anything that comes into your head”.

“I really can’t think of anything Ma, why don’t you just write about blogging”.

Thank you Kyle.

I have learnt a load of new skills.  From blog building to tagging and publicising on other platforms.  The list is endless.  And as life would have it, no sooner had I learnt a new skill than I needed it for another area in my life.  For once I did not have to waste time asking Google.

I must confess, I do not look for blogs, simply because I don’t have the time.  But, when someone likes one of my posts, or comments on it, I take the time to read their About page as well as their latest post.  If it appeals to me, I follow the blog via email so that I can read it on my phone at night.

As for my own blogging style, it is not topical, nor am I concerned with current events.  I have opened myself up and I blog honestly, about myself.  I do refrain from using names when I write about others because I have no intention of offending or hurting them.

I don’t know if my blog is enjoyable, or whether any of it speaks to anyone.  What I do know is that if only one person learnt something, laughed at something, or thought about something after I had shared of myself, it is a bonus.  Over and above what I had set out to do.

There is a lot I still don’t know about blogging but I know that in time, I will learn.  I don’t know what would be considered a good amount of traffic.  What is a good hit rate after six months, or a year?  But I don’t care about that too much.  Like I said, I blog for no other reason than to write.  I would be lying though if I said I did not like seeing feet through my cyber heart.

In summary I can say that on the whole, blogging has been richly rewarding to me personally.  Not because thousands of people read what I have to say, but because I feel a sense of accomplishment every time I press ‘publish’.  I really do.  And it is because I did what I love.  The reward is even greater on the days that I did not feel like it.

So, as for my blog and I, we shall soldier on.